What’s Your Emergency?

People ring the emergency police number for the daffiest reasons. For example, this woman troubled the good folk at the Avon and Somerset Constabulary with her concerns regarding a hungry squirrel:

And that brings us, ever so tangentially, to an item of literary news: you should go read Corwin Ericson’s new book, Checked Out OK, a baffling and hilarious compilation of hundreds of police log items from small towns in Western Massachusetts:

9:55 a.m. – A Rolling Green Drive resident told police that his girlfriend has been receiving poems at her Hadley workplace from a 60-year-old man. Amherst police advised the man to contact Hadley police about the problem.

12:51 a.m. – Police assisted people who were observing the salamanders crossing Henry Street.

Other reported concerns include people licking the road and ducks behaving oddly.